Number 3 is simply irresistible.
Are you sick of fighting, bored with sport tryouts, or tired of numbing through your evenings with Facebook?
You’re not alone. According to a Harris study, only 1 in 3 Americans report being happy.
The big house, fancy car, and super social life is great, but what does it matter if your not happy?
When you first married you signed away your time to work–in order to pay for all the stuff and the elusive American dream.
Once your kiddos arrived you two divided in hopes of conquering the work faster. The awful truth is that your To-Do list never ends, which leaves both of you apart and depleted.
Now you’re so used to living separate lives that it’s impossible to know where to start without it feeling awkward.
Thankfully there are 3 steps that you can take to get your happy marriage back:
Step 1: Slow down. It’s time that you took inventory of your lifestyle. Ask yourself, do my top five values align with the way that I live my life?
Chances are they don’t.
Tonight, dream with your partner about your ideal lifestyle. In Step 2, I’ll show you how to create an action plan to get you there.
Step 2: Simplify. You have too much going on. In your social calendar, sports shuttle service, and your home environment.
The trick is to trim the excess down into manageable pieces.
Let’s go back to your ideal lifestyle. In order for you to have a happy marriage you need to get back to living a life that is congruent with your values.
Think of one goal that you want to achieve in the next four weeks. Next, come up with three actions that you can take (in consecutive order) today, tomorrow, and the day after.
Please note: The actions are just to get things rolling. They are not meant to achieve your goal in 3 days.
For example, let’s imagine that you and your partner want to go on at least three evening walks a week. Your action plan could look like this:
- Today: Set up a carpool schedule for sports
- Tomorrow: Step down from chairing the PTA
- The Day After: Assign daily chores to each member in the family so evenings are less stressful.
In this simple, yet realistic plan you and your partner team up and kick ass making room in your schedules for “us” time.
Step 3: Savor. The final step is actually a BIG deal. Because it’s necessary to learn how to be present in order to find authentic happiness.
Once you realize your ideal lifestyle and simplify your life, you’ll have time to take in those moments that sparkle.
You feel alive when you allow yourself to connect to those you love the most. That happens when you unplug from your mind and simply take in the here and now.
The reality is that life will get away form you until you take it back and slow it down.
Jessica is the author of Back 2 Love and How to Start a Mental Health Private Practice. She blogs regularly on her website, JMillercoaching.com. Follow her on Twitter where she tweets about Top Relationship Tips.