Scientist discovers another benefit from our love hormone.
Does it REALLY matter where you and your spouse sit to watch television?
According to Time Magazine, close physical proximity produces a positive bond between a couple and promotes fidelity in males. This is thanks to the attachment hormone, oxytocin that’s released when you kiss, touch, or now even sit with your spouse.
In another study it was determined that heterosexual males where less likely to stray or be interested in looking at other attractive females if they felt bonded to their spouse.
Could Fidelity Be As Easy As Parking It Next To Your Partner?
There are a few more variables that come with keeping your marital boundaries intact, such as simply being nice to one another. But this study does provide good reason to change your seating arrangements.
Confessions From The Counselor
Let me be the first to say, that I know the grave effects of taking “together time” for granted. My husband and I are very fortunate in that we get to spend a lot of time together. So when our new living space required a different seating arrangement, I went for a more aesthetic appeal rather than functional. In layman’s terms we were forced to sit apart.
It was remarkable how quickly we experienced a disconnect. It only took four days for us to sense that something was off in our relationship. Well to be honest my husband was the first to bring up the lack of warmth he felt between us (which goes along with what the study reported).
And that’s when it hit us, it was the new seating arrangement! It was the fact that we had spent literally 12 hours in the past four days not touching (and yes I do realize that’s an extremely unhealthy amount of tube numbing time and thank gosh we rarely binge).
Instantly we went and extracted the small side table that kept us apart, smashed the chairs nice and tight together, and made a pact to go sofa shopping this weekend. The instant the two chairs were next to each other I felt an internal exhale of relief.
Now I’m not ignorant to the fact that many couples (most that I work with) don’t sit next to each other at the end of the day, or rarely have enough time to spend in the same room. But how can we ignore the findings of this simple study?
This Weeks Challenge
I want you to stop assuming that where you sit doesn’t have an impact on how close you feel as a couple. Who knows, your partner might be like everyone in the study and need close proximity to feel like he has a positive relationship with you (and like the study indicated, remain faithful).
So tonight when you plop down in your favorite spot, look to see where your partner is. If he’s on the sofa and you’re not, move your butt. Even if it’s been a while and it’s awkward, do it anyway.
Sit by each other for seven straight days and then check in with how you feel. Talk to your partner about this article and show him the study that is linked in the second paragraph.
Now, I double dog dare you to park it next to your partner and reconnect!
Jessica is the author of Back 2 Love and How to Start a Mental Health Private Practice. She owns a practice in New Prague, Minnesota where she lives with her husband, two kids, and two dogs.